The House, Please
tensions were running high and by
that I mean we were all in the
mood to set the atmosphere
on fire an explosive atmosphere
like dirt you spit from
your mouth in a cloud at
your neighbor you look like
space being taken up by matter
and man do you look good
doing it and my face is like a
tree is what happens at midnight
when you forget how cold your
toes can get
War
You are the conductor of a huge orchestra
it is opening night everyone sounds like
the rush of the sea you tap your baton
against the podium nobody moves
everyone continues to talk you decide to
start and everything is all wrong the tubas
sound like the trombones the trumpets like
the oboes the violins the saxophones
the cellos like birds chirping the drums cry
like babies the flutes a piano and you you
yell and emit the sound of a siren and all
the noises together produce such a
magnificent melody and it’s opening night
and the sea the sea is applauding for
you and you're helplessly confused
Uprooted
I walk outside, and a squirrel jumps down from the tree by my house, somehow carrying a pistol. It drops the pistol at my feet, and nudges me against the leg with its nose, then runs up the gutter of my house. I look at the pistol for a few moments before I bend down and pick it up. A family of white mice jumps out from under my porch, dragging a Kevlar bulletproof vest behind them. They leave it on top of my feet, and all point their noses up at me, twitching for a moment before scampering off, each in its own direction. I put the vest on, pistol in hand, and forgot what I had gone outside for, anyway. A few birds in the tree by my house open their beaks, and loud sirens emit from their depths. I hit the deck, not knowing what exactly to expect, but feeling somewhat prepared.
Offended
In a split-instant, everything stops moving. The train blowing it’s horn, the car turning abruptly, the squirrel hopping onto the tree, the woman and the woman spinning hand in hand, the deer bounding out of the forest, the lion close at it’s heels, owls hanging upside down, the baby flying through the air, the explosion, and me, unable to breathe, without the slightest idea of what was going on—the deafening, constant noises of that moment.
Extended
In the middle of the night, in a dark house somewhere, without windows, covered in thick, grey vines, I call out but can’t hear my own voice. Is there anybody there. Is there anybody there. I know I’m saying this, from years of calling-out experience, but all of a sudden I’m unsure. I could have just as easily been saying is the rainy bud either or is the rent I bought in air. I continue to holler, hearing nothing of what I’m saying, and the more I consider these other options, the less surprising it is that nobody answers. And I wonder whether I’m hopelessly lost when I cry I stare in the butter, the hair.
Chestnuts
I encounter more and more lunatics with each passing day. Ones that tell me about the rapture, ones that tell me about the end of the world, others that tell me business propositions, and others that tell me about their favorite ice cream flavors. They come in all shapes and sizes, but they all have one thing in common. They all look like people I’ve known, or people I’ve encountered before. I know this is a trick. Disguised, every last one of them. How do you address a lunatic? Leave me alone, lunatic. How’s life, lunatic. I’ve missed you, lunatic. I think theses things, but I can’t bring myself to say them.
Prowler
Uncle Pete would walk around and tell us about the thing that was above him at all times. We all thought he was senile, or something like that. He would say There’s something right above me, I know it, but don’t look at it, whatever you do. We never did look at it. We respected Uncle Pete that way. He was the type of man who would give you a nickel for an honest day’s work. He was the type of man who would buy you desert after a meal, even if you didn’t ask. It could have been a god, or a dragon, or a thunderstorm, or a ghost, or anything, really. It didn’t matter. Uncle Pete died with that thing above his head, the thing that nobody knew.
Call
I walked into my chicken coop to collect eggs in the morning. It seemed as though all my chickens had been replaced by small, soft, baby rabbits. Confounded, I began to walk out of the coop. Wait I heard a voice say. I turned back, but there was nobody. Don’t you want your eggs the voice said. It was coming from one of the slots near the back of the coop. I shook my head and walked back to my house. Later that day, I was at the hardware store, picking up a set of socket wrenches when I saw Cornelius. Hey, Corn I said. Why, Jefferson, it’s been so long he said. How have you been I said. Great, just been worried about Darleen. She’s on vacation in the Pocono’s he said. Hasn’t she been on that vacation for years I said. Cornelius frowned. You always did like to open wounds, Jefferson he said. I’m sorry, Corn. Want to hear the damndest thing I said. Cornelius nodded, but he continued to frown. When I went to my coop this morning, it was full of the cutest little rabbits I’ve ever seen, and then when I was leaving, I heard on of them talk to me, ask me if I wanted my eggs I said. Cornelius nodded. You believe me I said. Crazier things have happened he said. Why, the other day, all my horses turned into cows. Imagine the scene, a field full of galloping, braying cows he said. We looked at the wall of tools in silence for what seemed like an eternity. Farming isn’t what it used to be I said. Cornelius nodded, but he was in a faraway place. Maybe in the Pocono’s with Darleen, riding on cows into the sunset.
Target
I went in to work, and my boss told me my task for the day, like he did every time I came in. Today, Bob, you’re going to stack as many pencils as you can into a pyramid he said. I sat down and opened the drawers to my desk. They were filled with perfectly sharpened pencils. I stacked a few pencils together, but one of the bottom foundation pencils gave way, causing the entire pile to scatter and fall all over my desktop and the floor. I gathered the pencils, and started stacking them again. I did this until my hands were trembling and sore, but I just couldn’t manage to make a good pyramid. I wasn’t able to do it I said as my boss walked in. That’s ok, you did good work. See you tomorrow, Bob he said, giving me a hard pat on the back that nearly knocked me out of my seat. The next day, I walked in a few minutes late. I had trouble sleeping, because my hands were trembling too violently. Hey there, Bob. Are we feeling a little under the weather he said. I need my star worker, today. I nodded. I’m fine, really I said. Ok, well, today I need you to tear as many Kleenex in half as you can he said. Then, at the end of the day, I want to see how many you can toss into the air at the same time he said. I opened my drawers, and they were filled with Kleenex, now. Also, Bob, I want to just commend you on how great of a job you’ve been doing. Really brilliant work. You’re a valuable asset to the company he said, slamming me on the back again. I’m not sure why I kept that job. My name isn’t even Bob.
Darling
I go hunting for deer. This isn’t unusual; I hunt for deer practically every day. As I sit, hidden and camouflaged, I notice an infant crawling in the distance in between a few trees. I watch it through my scope and begin to look around, to see if there is anybody watching it. I see another baby a few feet away, crawling like the other. They are crawling towards me. I see another, and another. Soon, I see hundreds of babies, all crawling towards me out in the middle of nowhere, emerging from the trees like an army. I lay my rifle down, and walk towards the babies, unafraid. The babies surround me and grab my legs. I fall, and they all begin to bite me with their toothless mouths. It is a surprisingly soothing and relaxing death.
Hearing
As I step onto the subway, I immediately notice a person who looks exactly like me. At first, I think that he is my reflection, but sure enough, he is three-dimensional. I know this because I walk around him, sitting and fast sleep, and view him from every possible angle. He is like a perfect wax replica, and he is even wearing clothes that are remarkably similar to mine. The other passengers look on with marked interest. One approaches me. Is this your twin the woman says. No, I’ve never encountered this person before I say. She turns back to the other passengers and nods. Another passenger stands up. A long lost twin, maybe the man says. No, not that I know of, at least I say. All the other passengers look at each other and nod, seemingly in unison. Well, this town isn’t big enough for the both of you the woman says. One of you has to go the man says. On cue, the person who looks exactly like me begins to stir. When our eyes meet, we immediately understand each other. We’ll have to fight this mob off, and one of us is sure to die, but it’s the noble and brave way to go about this sort of thing.
Poppies
I went out to look for somebody. I wasn’t sure exactly who I was looking for, but it was somebody specific, I knew. Ah, I’ve found you I said to the first person I passed, but I knew this wasn’t right. Excuse me the man said. Never mind, I was mistaken I said. What’s this about he said. Oh, I’m looking for somebody specific, but I’m not sure who I said. The man thought this over for a moment. Can I come along and help you out he said. I don’t have anything to do today, and I just don’t know what to do with myself. The man seemed sincere. Sure, any help would be great I said. We walked around, searching the crowds of faces for somebody until it grew dark. We found an alleyway and we settled there to sleep for the night. Are you sure that I wasn’t the person you were looking for the man said. How could I be sure I said. We fell asleep thinking about everything we wished we had.
